Last night, something happened that helped me to confirm that no longer babysitting is what is best for the family. I had run to the grocery store and Steve and the boys were having movie night at home. All evening, Silas had complained that he was sick. Finally, Steve got out of him what was wrong.
Silas told Steve that Brady and Maddie had told him that they don't like him and that they didn't want to be his friend. He says that they told him that they never wanted to play with him again. Wow, harsh words, but this isn't completely their faults. Don't think I'm blaming a 2 and a 4 year old for making Silas so upset.
What has really happened, and it has taken stepping back and pondering it to figure it out, is that Avery and Silas have always been best buddies at home. They do everything together. Or should I say "did" everything together. And at first, Avery was sort of left out as Silas and Brady stuck together. But as time has evolved, Brady and Avery have really gotten to playing together quite a bit and Silas feels left out. He often complains that he just doesn't fit in. No one will play with him.... you get the drift. So, Silas now feels in competition for time with his brother, new friend, and his mom too. Tough stuff for a very introverted 4 year old to handle.
So, even though it is sad to say goodbye to our friends today, it is definitely for the best. My children need each other as much as they need their mommy. I look forward to cuddling my own children without worrying about what impact I am making on these other little ones who also need me. I pray that Brady and Maddie will be loved and well cared for at their new babysitter's house. I will miss them, but I know this is the right decision!
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